Greif- a personal reflection

Unfortunately this year and especially these past few months I have experienced deaths.  Both deaths were sudden but I dealt with them differently. The first one was the loss of a child, my good friends son whom I had been watching for several months each monday. He passed away suddenly during nap on a tuesday. You can imagine how hard it was to digest the truth that one moment he was here and the next gone. The grief process took quite awhile to sort through as I also had to process that my friend lost her child and I still had mine. It was hard to work through all the different emotions, but really what got me through it was the strength of my friend.  I clung to the truth of Christ and though at times I felt it wasn’t fair, I knew that God is a just God. 

Then my dearest Grandma Dee passed away in her sleep, an eerie similarity. However the age difference was a large gap, she still died at a young age 77. The greif was different, in many ways I cried less and dealt with it differently. Maybe Grahams death prepared me for my grandmothers death, she was able to live a full abundant life. She was a believer in Christ, thus no doubt she is in a way better place than Earth. I was able to spend 30 years with her and only 11months with Graham. 

At times I was mad at myself for not crying over my grandma’s death, I was sad but I think my mourning was different because there was more of a hope and such a great legacy left.

One thing that is undeniable between the two experiences is that God was honored at both funerals and His name is to be praised. I am so thankful that I have Christ in my life and that I can experience great loss and still draw closer to Him. I am hopeful that both tragedies will bring more people to know, trust and experience God.

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