Lately I have been challenged to be real with people. I never intentionally am fake or untruthful with people but at times will hold back. I like people who speak their mind freely and are not apologetic about what they believe. All too often the very people who do speak their minds are usually the same people who say some really foolish things. There has got to be a balance of truthfulness and mercy along with good judgment and timing. I long for relationships with others that are real and authentic, where what ever I say will be taken in a way that is respected and forgiven. I also want to be on the receiving end of honest people who will tell me what they are feeling, the struggles they have and just do life with me. My struggle is as much as I want this, I also need to surround myself with other people who want the same thing, otherwise it won’t work.
In my experience in life and upbringing its a world of keeping in the house. Meaning what is going on at home stays there and don’t let anyone know what is wrong, don’t let them come in and find your “dirty laundry” both literally and figuratively. I feel it has gotten worse as I have gotten older and good friends have gotten farther away, its hard to communicate, hard to do life if you are worlds away. It takes effort and vulnerability as well as the things we deal with get harder, more embarrassing and involved more people.
Facebook is amazing for several reasons, however it is also at times a relationship breaker rather than maker. I say this because we can “stay in touch” just enough to say we are friends with someone, however we don’t “really” know what’s going on. Only the things that are posted and shared and tweeted and YouTube. It really is only a piece of life that we see, because frankly if someone is an over sharer we tend to “block” the News feed and if they say something the least bit controversial its pretty crazy how many “friends” come out of the woodworks to either agree or disagree.
In a world of free speech, not many people exercise that freedom in a way that is edifying or helpful. I am not saying that we need to filter everything, I am actually saying the opposite we need to speak what is on our hearts, not our minds. Speak truth in love but speak it and be okay with what results in that spoken truth. Going through life afraid of what others may think of us, leaves us only with a lot of “Facebook friends”. (I am not knocking FB, just using it as an example).
So here is my truth for the day. I want deeper relationships with people but I get so nervous just calling up people. I don’t know what to talk about and frankly talking on the phone has never been fun for me. My grandma however she loved it, could spend hours on the phone talking with friends, maybe the reason she had so many she was able to keep in touch with. I am going to make an effort to be rejected, to make a phone call and it not be answered or even to get a call back. I am trying to be better at living intentionally not only with my ministry but also with other aspects of my life.