Women’s day…everyday am I right?

Last weekend I was blessed with the ability and opportunity to have a weekend away with some amazing women. I knew a few of them but the majority I had never met as they were coming from all over Uganda and even South Sudan. As I was reflecting about that weekend I am amazed at how strong God made us women. Throughout my life I have come to know and cross paths with some of the strongest women that God is using for his Kingdom. I truly believe after hearing stories of trials and tribulation that women face, it is only through God’s grace that women can turn a tragedy into a triumph for His glory. I am so thankful for the testimonies and the amount of prayer that went on this past weekend. God has a world full of amazing women who are faithful to complete the work that He has set before them. I wanted to highlight a few amazing women, ones that I won’t name but want to give the Glory to God for the impact they make in my life and in the lives of countless others around the world.

One woman came into my life through her amazing music. I always love hearing her sing and all for the glory of God. You can tell when someone has passion for what they are singing it radiates through them and just gives you goosebumps. I only found out about her life story years later when she was open enough to share with the world the horrible life she led as a child. But even though she had to deal with a whole lotta crud she is dealing with it and she is make a difference in the lives of others who also have dealt with abuse.

Another strong woman is a friend I made when we first returned to the United States and God intentionally put our lives together for a reason. We did life together and it was wonderful to have a friend and a fellow mom who also was just doing her best to raise tiny humans. Then for a reason we will never understand her son died and the heartache that followed at times seemed unbearable. But what I know is that she has never wavered in her love for God, and she is brutally honest about how hard life is, but she still lives it and loves in it. I am proud to be her friend.

Another woman who probably never knew how much she meant to me because she left this earth too soon for me. She was caring, friendly and a bit of a rule breaker. She was a great mother and wonderful grandmother and even got to be a great grandmother. She fought through injuries, cancer and a whole lot of responsibility. She loved to travel and meet new people and I believe that is how God used her. God used her outgoing caring personality to reach people wherever they were and she didn’t even have to mention God because they saw it in her. She was a witness of how amazing God is just through her presence. She was social, she was relational and that is what made her special. She has taught me to be okay with who I am and to take risks by how much I love others, even strangers.

God has placed so many women in my life who I can learn from and grow because of. I am eternally grateful that women in my life have been the ones who led me to Christ, taught me how to be a mother, a teacher, a leader, a speaker, a singer, a missionary, a friend, a mentor and much more. This journey that God has placed me on is not an easy one but He has placed women along the road to help me, pray for me and guide me into being a woman that God can say…”Well done my daughter, you good and faithful servant.”

 

Grandma Deeeeee

This holiday season we are away from our extended family and I will admit the memories come flooding for me. My grandma Dee (my mom’s mom) always brings back great memories of Christmas time. The travel to Beatrice, Ne wasn’t long and so the time spent in the car wasn’t torture like when we would travel to Iowa. I can’t compare the two places for Christmas, because they were different in so many ways. One thing was the same though memories. The memories I made were generally with my cousins and sleeping in sleeping bags or on sofas. We would play games, we would make up songs, we would talk about how lame it was to play with younger cousins (who now we totally would hang out with). Grandma Dee always made every child feel unique even if they got the same gift as their cousin who was in their age range. She always had Christmas cookies, we ate pizza at least once, because when you have 14 grand kids you order pizza.

The reason I decided to dedicate this blog to my grandma Dee is that she used to send out emails updating us on her many adventures. She would literally tell us at times everything she did. I was just looking through my emails and saw that I had saved some old family emails from my grandma. It was an email from 2009 when she was travelling in Colorado. She was so funny when she wrote often laughing at her own jokes. My mom does the same things now a bit shorter stories (and usually about Nebraska sports and weather). I will probably do the same when my kids get to the age of emails…if that is still something that exists when they are older.

Memories are something that can bring joy and a bit of sadness. I miss both my grandma’s a lot during the holidays. My grandma Ruby passed away on Christmas eve when I was a freshman in college. It changed the holiday for all of us because Christmas was one of my grandma Ruby’s favorite holidays.  She literally would have a pile of presents surrounding her chair and she wouldn’t open them because she was too busy watching everyone else open theirs. She didn’t want to miss any joy from her loved ones. She would then have the grand kids help her open hers so we wouldn’t have to wait forever. She always cried every single time that we had to leave to go back home, she just wanted her kids and grand kids to live near her so she could show them love all the time.

My grandma Dee was on one of her adventures when she passed away in her sleep. She always said she didn’t want to die old like her mother who lived until she was 96. She wanted to live life to the fullest never wanting to be any burden to anyone. She was a giver not a taker, I would say she also loved Christmas, but more for the family time and servant hood that she could provide.

This Christmas season is difficult for many, but what I have tried to remind myself is that each year we can reflect on the things of the world or we can reflect on the things of eternity. I am so thankful that both my grandma’s are in heaven and putting all the traditions and family time memories aside the reason for Christmas is only Christ. It is not about what we gain from the season from the people on earth, but what we gained on ONE Christmas which was Jesus. I am so blessed to come from a long line of followers of Jesus and one day when my grand kids think of memories of me I want them to remember one main thing… Jesus!

Merry CHRISTmas.

 

Trials of 2017

James 1:2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds…

What are my trials that I am facing? I want to try and be authentic about this part of my life right now. 2017 has not been the best year of my life, nor the worst; but I can say that many trials have been faced and continue to be faced. The most obvious one is the new addition of 3 tween boys who have lived with us full-time since January. To say it has been an adjustment is an understatement. When you think you might have a good thing going it often changes with the weather, especially when there are now 7 different moods, opinions, behaviors, schedules, stresses, and coping strategies.

We have moved 4 times in Parkers 4 years of life from Omaha to Uganda House 1 Masoli, then to House 2 Bukoto and most recently House 3 Kasanga. We told ourselves I don’t want to move for a long time and then we get robbed in the very house that we want to stay in for a long period of time. That was a major trial and at times still is, our lives were forever altered. I had flashbacks to our first year of marriage where I was robbed outside our apartment at gunpoint. Matt had restless nights waking up to any little sound he would hear outside. Every night it would take hours to fall asleep because any noise outside would prevent us from being able to rest.

Not being able to travel “home” this year has been a big heartache for us. We miss friends and family physically being with us. We miss the comforts that a first world country offers. The familiarity and convenience of getting what we need and what we want. The reality that we are not financially able to just go “home” like other people are. The lack of flexibility we have to leave our ministry in capable hands and see that it would run without our constant support. The fact we can’t travel with our boys yet because they have no documentation or clearance to move around with us outside of Uganda.

Missionary families moving onto other countries and the relationships that we developed with them altered. Opening up ourselves to be hurt, lonely and at times envious of where they are heading and the lives they will lead without us. The stress of making new friends and always having to be the “outgoing” person because if you are shy and introverted then good luck finding friendships.

Friends and family dealing with loss and heartbreak a world away from us and we can’t be there to comfort them. We can’t experience the new births and the deaths, marriages and moves. You can’t be there when someone is sick or going through a crisis; you can’t physically touch someone, hold their hand, hug them tight or say I love you in person.

But if life were only the first part of the verse then it would be a complete tragedy not pure joy. The second part of that verse says… “because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Allow perseverance to finish its work, so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

As much as I don’t like facing trials those trials happen for a reason. I often don’t know what those reasons are and I don’t always face them joyfully. But I do know that my God will give me the ability to persevere. He will equip me when I read His word and pray to Him to be able to come out of any trial better than when I faced it.

We have had so many blessings in the midst of the trials, victories in the midst of defeat and hope in the midst of hopelessness. We have gained more than we have lost and loved more than we thought we ever could. It is all because of Christ and His goodness despite our shortcomings. Thank you God for that and through those trials and the ones to come I know that through it all I will always find God with me by my side holding my hand or when I am too weak He will be carrying me through the storm.

I will end with one of my favorite poems…

Footprints in the Sand

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed
he was walking along the beach with the LORD.
Across the sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene he noticed two sets of
footprints in the sand: one belonging
to him, and the other to the LORD.
When the last scene of his life flashed before him,
he looked back at the footprints in the sand.
He noticed that many times along the path of
his life there was only one set of footprints.
He also noticed that it happened at the very
lowest and saddest times in his life.
This really bothered him and he
questioned the LORD about it:
“LORD, you said that once I decided to follow
you, you’d walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life,
there is only one set of footprints.
I don’t understand why when
I needed you most you would leave me.”
The LORD replied:
“My son, my precious child,
I love you and I would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you.”

Author: Carolyn Joyce Carty

Go into all the world and preach the Gospel

So yesterday when I left school I went out to Gayaza to help in the distribution of ice cream to the students who had earned it. It was then that I asked three of the older children if they wanted me to lead Bible Study tomorrow and they nodded their head yes. I said okay what do you want me to teach about? I had told them a while back that I wasn’t going to be teaching them the same old Bible stories that they had heard for years. I wanted to get out of the baby stage of their faith and really challenge them to want to learn more about the Bible. So I got what I asked for that day, they gave me a list of some really deep lessons that I could talk about and I was able to teach a lesson on the Holy Spirit (I felt very underqualified) it was only through the Holy Spirit that I was able to teach that day.

That was a great day and I had one young man who was searching and I was able to tell him about Jesus Christ and I feel he really got it. See, he was worried about doing the right things and wondering how he would know if he had the holy spirit. What a great opportunity God gave to me. This Friday the three boys said they wanted to 1. Learn how to be a Christian in today’s society. 2. What prophecies have been fulfilled in the Bible? 3. What are miracles that were performed by people other than Jesus?

Again, I thought really; how am I going to be able to do this by tomorrow. I got home and there was no internet to bail me out either; but I did google it this morning and printed something that I thought could at least give me a start. I decided on prophesies and focused on the prophesy that Jesus and others talked of regarding the signs that the end times were coming. I had a larger group than normal due to the many activities of the day and I started out with two questions what is a prophesy and who are some prophets? We had a pretty good list, and then someone said Muhamad. What an opportunity to talk about false prophets too.

Again God provided me the opportunity to share the gospel as one of the prophesies is that the world will have heard the Good News. So I was challenging them because I said that obviously there were still people who have not heard the Good News and that is why I am in Uganda. I also told them a little bit about “The Case for Christ” and his testimony. Challenging them to collect the information, to find the facts, but that ultimately they would have to have the faith to believe it all to be true. I stood on the bench and said to them that I believe in Jesus, that he is God’s son, he died for our sins, and rose again and that he is preparing a place for me and he will return one day. I said to them that I can only tell them the truth and it is them that has to make a decision either accept or reject.

In essence I actually was able to answer all three topics in one lesson as the miracle that Lee Strobel who was an atheist came to believe in Jesus Christ, prophecies of the end times and how to be a Christian in today’s world; tell everyone about the love of Jesus.

I put some kids to sleep, I had some kids never take their eyes off me, and I had kids giving me a hand clap and a hallelujah. I felt good that I had done my part and that I didn’t have to worry that God would do his part. Pray for these boys and girls as they are teenagers who don’t really have any other program targeted for them. They are a forgotten age group and we have a huge responsibility to reach them and to equip them to reach their friends for Christ. I must say though God knows how to motivate me after a week of some frustrating adults, he refreshes me with these crazy kids.

Childhood Memories

You know when you have good intentions, but then sometimes the reaction you get you aren’t so sure it was a good idea; well that was me today. I was trying to get the kids to work on writing projects today and Matt gave me the idea to have the kids reflect on this past year, where it started and where we are now. The thought behind it was to help improve their writing, to provide an opportunity for reflection and to be thankful for what this past year God has been doing in their lives. Let’s just say Tendo the oldest eventually got it and did a great job, however Happy and Kitibwa were in tears and still didn’t put together a cohesive piece.

During my quiet time I was reflecting on that moment from earlier today and it made me think about childhood memories. I think some memories are made up of what other people have told us through stories. Through those stories that they remember we then imagine in our minds what it would have looked like and replay it for ourselves how we think it would have looked like. Other memories we remember because they were happy, painful, scary…just like that movie “Inside Out”. I don’t know that it is healthy to relive those moments but I do know we should recall moments to help us make decisions in the present and future. I think there is a purpose for recalling that God gives us to help us along the journey of life.

My memories- This one I heard (more when I was approaching driving age) and put my own visual recall. I lost my tooth at an amusement park “Peony Park” on the go cart track. I knew how to go but not how to stop. See I was a tall 4-year-old and I put the pedal to the metal in the wrong direction and ran into the attendant straight into the tires. I lost my tooth when I came to a halt and that was the last time that I drove a go cart until I was a bit older.

Praying to receive Christ with Betty Garrett and sharing it with everyone, even my friend Becky whose mom didn’t like that I was telling her daughter about Christ and then we couldn’t be friends anymore.

Cutting my wrist on broken glass when I was out collecting “treasures” to play house in my tree house out on the farm. My mom put butterfly stitches and I still have the scar today.

Selling my doll house back to my grandma when I had out grown playing with dolls.

Playing “college” with my cousin Bethany whenever we felt too cool to play with all the younger cousins.

My first “boyfriend” in middle school who asked my friend to call me for him to ask me out. Mind you I had no clue who she was talking about but to have an 8^th grader ask me out “well sure”. Needless to say that lasted about 2 days when he had someone call me to dump me, because I wouldn’t hold his hand anymore. Almost as bad as the date I had with an 11^th grader as a freshman where we couldn’t go to an “R” rated movie because I was too young, he wanted to take a romantic walk around the lake but I wasn’t that into him and I said it was too buggy and just wanted to go home. (he took someone else to prom, and got food poisoning)

There are so many childhood memories that I remember and most of them were pretty great. But I do remember the hard ones that taught me lessons and the ones that I reflect and realize God’s protection. Memories can be hard especially with our kids who have had more difficult ones, but it is always important to remember how God has protected us and shaped us into who we are today. Memories are stories that can help others learn and heal, protect and guide. Don’t be afraid to share your stories-even the ones that may hurt because how wonderful is the journey that God has delivered us from and how amazing is the journey we have ahead.

I challenge you to remember something today that may help you or someone else find hope and healing in Jesus name.

Busy at the Arnett house

We have been so busy….life has been nonstop it seems since the week before school when teachers had to report. It is definitely time for an update. I am leading the Early Years Team and heading up the K3 classroom. It has been fun! Parker and Jacob have both been doing great in school and enjoy their friends and their teachers (especially Parker).

We made it through the hectic schedule of balancing Uganda’s school break and our International school not being on break. We did a lot of traveling back and forth from school to our ministry. Matt is also keeping life busy by volunteering at the Senior Acacia School as the soccer(football) coach.

I have mentioned before that we have always talked about adopting and wouldn’t you know the moment that we get started with filling out the forms to get started with the process, God has a new plan for us; Happy, Kitiibwa, and Tendo.  Three boys who have been a part of Rising Star for several years. We got to know them better when we first arrived in May 2015, they were always participating in Rising Star activities both on and off the football pitch.

https://www.youcaring.com/fundraiser-widget.aspx?frid=661681

So the past 3 weeks have been filled with prayer and preparation. We hit a road block, but we are pushing through because God is bigger than a greedy government official asking for an unnecessary outrageous bribe. Can you imagine someone asking for 500,000 Ugx ($150) to literally do the minimum part of his job which is to check the status of the homes and file paperwork? Then when we refuse to pay him, he refuses to do the home inspection. Thankfully we have quality, qualified, God-fearing Ugandans who know the law and will help us move around this and continue on our journey to help this family.

How are we helping? Well we are going to foster these amazing boys and also hopefully help their sister who has been struggling to provide for them, by sending her back to school. We are excited for their arrival and due to the road block we will be delayed a bit, so we are sending the two youngest Happy and Kitiibwa to a boarding school right by our house. This will allow them to finish out the year and hopefully they can move to the next grade and not have to repeat.

3 beds ready for the boys once our paperwork goes through. The start-up costs are high and we could use all the help we can get. Please pray for us through this journey.

Life Matters-The success of our Future

Why is it that sports are the key to success in the lives of so many? Why if you are good at a sport that equals success in life? We give scholarships and recruit people to play for “our” team. We want to win! You see it all over the world, where someone who without a sports scholarship would have “failed” in life. Why is that? Why is it that we as a society think that we should only be helping those that essentially can help us? Why is it that we push kids through high school and college to get their education, but only if they are the top performers at their sport or talent?

Why do we not invest in everyone regardless of their talent? We find that here in Uganda with Rising Star. We can fairly easily find support for children who are good athletes. Schools will pay for their education in order to get the “star” athlete to compete for the pride of their school. But what about those that do not have an athletic bone in their body, sure they may like to play but they are not at the “top” level of performance. Well one might think they can focus more on their academics to make it further in education. Study harder to get good grades and earn scholarships that way.

I want to challenge our thinking as a human race. A profound thought….what if we treated everyone as equal when they started school. Picture this you are the teacher of a classroom of 3 year olds and you know everything about these kids, what country they come from, how much money their parents make, what kind of house they live in, what kind of meals they get at home, and a multitude of other information. Then you decided that no matter what obstacles they start out having because of whom they were born to, that you would cater to their every need. That you would make sure they succeeded in life because you invested in their life. That you in fact leveled the playing field of sorts; that every child was given the opportunity they needed to succeed. You went above and beyond the norm and you made sure that when they left your class they were set up for success.

Imagine that every single person in their life, invested in their life. Their parents, their educators, their doctor, dentist, coach, pastor, neighbor, relative, policeman, store manager, and stranger. Imagine that no matter their relationship to one another, everyone worked together to make sure that child succeeded. That child and every child that crossed their path. You see it is not impossible for us to enrich each other’s lives, to make a better future and successful nations. It takes individuals to invest outside of the “stars”, to make everyone a star.

At Rising Star and at Acacia my goal is to treat every single child with the respect and decency they deserve. To learn their story and to make sure that I give everything that I can offer to make sure that when they leave my care they are set up for a brighter future. What is your role in making the future brighter for our children? My prayer is that we can lead by example and start a new way of thinking that every life is valuable, that no matter the predisposition they may have that we make it a level playing field of opportunity for success.

#livesmatter #dosomethingaboutit #changetheworldforgood

American Pride

When we study History, one would think that we would learn from it. I just got done watching a movie on the Olympic athlete James Cleveland “Jesse” Owens, called the “Race”. Find out more about him… https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesse_Owens

You would think that it would make me reflect back on how the Nazi’s were so horrible. What is really horrible is that fact that we were doing the same thing and some respects still are on a subtle level. At least the Germans were not hiding their hatred, Isis is not hiding their hatred. But why are Americans still struggling to admit that they are prejudice of those who are not White, Male, and Christian?

The Olympics is a time when we are all about USA, no matter what that looks like. People cheer for the USA to win. It becomes everyone else is the “bad” team and USA is the best team. I will admit we at this house have been cheering and celebrating the victories of the Olympics. My kids even are pointing out the American flag and cheering for the “good” guys. But are we the good guys?

We have so much diversity in the USA and we put the blinders on when it comes to sports. We forget about all the obstacles that athletes of different race, gender and economic status have to face. We forget that many of these athletes have to work twice as hard as others just to get recognized. They only can complete because they are so good, one would be stupid not to have them apart of their team.

But what happens when they miss the mark? What if they don’t win the Gold or the trophy, or the title of Champion? When they don’t have their uniform on, how are they treated? Before they are “discovered”, how were they treated by the masses? Human beings, Americans who have families, bills, and responsibilities on top of the immense pressure to be the Best.

Every four years people watch on television and cheer for USA. We need to be cheering for more than just the athletes, we need to be proud of more than just winning. We need to be “proud to be an American”. Right now I don’t know that I am that proud of anything that Americans are doing or have been doing over the years.

How can we as Americans be worth rooting for fulltime not just every time there is an Olympics on TV. One thought would be to respect each other, pray for each other, forgive each other and listen to each other. I still hold onto the hope that America will one day be a nation that truly is united as “One nation under God, indivisible with justice and Liberty for All.”

Contradiction or Adaptation?

This thought came to mind while Jacob was playing soccer, “He doesn’t take charge and get after the ball.” Then I thought, “He is always taking away things and taking charge in other situations.” It made me think of how confusing it is to be a child (okay and an adult), to reason out when to act in the right accord. We are taught to share, through taking turns and being kind when we play. Then we are told to take charge, go get the ball and fight for it. We are told to wait in line and not to push ahead, hold the door for someone and let them in first. Then we are told, you have to take a chance and pull out otherwise you will be stuck and go nowhere in traffic. Be proud of who you are, but not too proud, putting down what other people are.

There are many more examples in life where it seems life is a constant contradiction; but is it really? I hear all the time that the Bible is full of contradictions, but is it really? In life we are constantly put in different situations and we have to decide what the best response for that specific situation is. You can have a different response to the “same situation” if even one factor is different. Life is not full of contradictions, it’s full of endless possibilities and we have to prepare for them all. We will fail and pick the wrong response, but we will have another opportunity to learn from those past mistakes and react differently.

We can dwell on all the mistakes of the past, worry about the mistakes in the future OR we can allow past mistakes to shape us into the future and keep daily working on not making the SAME mistakes. Because face it we are going to make mistakes, it’s how you deal with those mistakes and change them into something great. My hope is that I continue to teach my kids to make choices based on the situation at hand. To learn from their mistakes and to live a life full of possibilities, not blame the world of contradictions.

 

 

Jeremiah 7:22-28

 

They say that when something happens over and over and you expect different results you are crazy. Well call me crazy! Driving in Uganda is what makes me crazy. It is a way of life to drive with just yourself to care about. They say when a Ugandan gets into a car they lose the ability to fear death. When I get into the car I fear death might come. A police officer once told Matt that the guy who was cutting everyone in line was just doing what Ugandans do. Her exact words, “Ehh, that’s what they do, it’s just expected.” In my opinion, even if something is wrong, if a culture does it enough it becomes right to them. So yes, it is wrong to speed, overtake cars, turn in front of others, knock people and keep going, make three lanes when there is room for one, and I could go on. However, if it has become so normal to do those things; so normal that even the police who know the law don’t stop you; then why would you stop? I find it very difficult myself, to do the right thing, when everyone else is doing the wrong thing. Even more when it means I might never get to my destination, let alone on time. Is the answer if enough people start doing the right thing THAT might be the new normal?

I think it might be the hardest thing to teach someone who sees something as normal, but explaining that just because everyone does it, doesn’t make it right. That “everyone” might be doing it wrong. Something might be really hard to enforce if a majority of people are doing it, but that doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be enforced. If a rule or a law was put into place, but now no one follows it, does that mean the law itself needs to be changed? If you change a law shouldn’t you then put a new one in its place?

All that I am posing is that we as Christians have a responsibility to act in such a way that is pleasing to the Lord. So what that looks like? For me it means that I need to keep myself in check, with what the Word of God says. I need to understand why I was instructed to act a certain way. Truth be told law is a good law if it was put into place to protect the person following the law. As a mom, and a teacher it is my responsibility to put rules in place, and enforce them for the benefit of the child. All that being said, obey the law set before you, because it is there to help you, protect you and guide you to a life worth living.